Yesterday was an extremely exciting and possibly one of the happiest. But I knew deep down inside, later, it will be also one of the saddest and heart-wrenching days of my life. I missed Single Camera Production with no MC or LOA for this event. I felt it was worth my absence. Truly it was. Earth-shattering, hand-trembling.

So, well in the morning, the Connect Singapore project was on! I arrived in Bishan around 8am, got my breakfast from 7-11 and cabbed to Teck Ghee Primary. Met my BIC (Block IC), HH, at around 8.30am. Then we discussed a little more, giving out of block identity (green band tied around our heads). Saying "Wah, Ain, how did you do it? Why do you always come so early? I mean, do you put it on yourself or something?" I replied to HH: "I feel it's my duty to be here and might as well make the most out of it." At that point, I knew that later in the day, I was going to cry and feel extreme pain.

Then, me, Cheronne and Hui Shan made our way to Teck Ghee Pri not far from the MRT line where we met. As we were walking, the East Coast Pri bus zoomed along beside us. We looked at each other, and we ran like mad! We were supposed to receive them in Teck Ghee Pri! LOL! We managed to get there at the nick of time. My ham and cheese sandwich felt like it was in my throat already from all that running.

We brought them to the canteen, where we then brought them to the basketball court. Then, we met Lee Qi, the CM (Chief Motivator) for East Coast. Cheronne was teh CM for Teck Ghee. We played some games, Alibomb (damn cute game) and catching (new version; our generation never played it before), broke them up into their respective 3 classes (5 Marlin, 5 Starfish and 5 XXX I'm not sure). Then, gave them break from 10-10.30am. Met Mrs Suhaimi from TGPS and confirmed with her the details. I was running here and there.

Panic! If the project did not work out, I'll cry like mad! I did not want to disappoint HH too. So, we then gathered the Teck Ghee and East Coast students up in teh hall where we interacted with them for a while. The schedule was disrupted a little since the teachers wanted to move out only at 11am. Hmm, ok then, I said. It wasn't too bad a delay. Won't hurt.

So, we moved out at 11am, TG first followed by EC. Chaotic! Block 4 was not there yet and we did not know where to start the TG alignment! Chaos! The teachers and parents I could see were kind of pissed off with us. LOL. I did my extremely best to join up everything in my sector. I was supposed to help Audrey at another sector but it seemed this sector needed me more. Yep. We tried to do a dry run ( we missed Suzanne Walker's cue to start dry run) and joined hands at this super dangerous T-junction. Then, I broke them up again, since the cars were already honking and lorries tailgating already.

When the moment came, I stopped the traffic with teh help of the AETOS officers. The countdown began! 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.......... SILENCE.

SILENCE! Can you believe it? It was planned and told to all of us that the DJ or Suzanne Walker (who was at the sector where the Persident would be) would recite the pledge. I saw the kids' confusion and disappointment, clearly etched on tehir sweaty faces. I was almighty scared for their safety at the T-junction. At least 20 of them were holding hands on teh road, with at least 5 cars behind them, and two pickups in front of them. All the while, I was breaking out in cold sweat. I swear to God, if anything happened to these innocent kids... It was really scary for me. Then, we held there for like 5 minutes, then I dispersed them. It was too much.

I was sad that it did not fully work out. The holding hands at the junction was perfect, everything was extremely perfect. There was nobody who did not hold hands. The connection was perfect. But I just wanted to question why the radio was silent at the very critical moment? WHY??? When all our hopes were pinned on that minute? Why was there no reciting of the pledge?

I dismissed the students with an almighty heavy heart; I did not serve justice to them. I waved them in the buses goodbye from where I was sitting. In my heart, I was already crying. I braced myself also, for the upcoming separation.

The event was a success actually. 29, 000 people were mobilised, all youths. So how many organisations and students have actually done that? Most importantly, I told HH as he was talking to me, Cheronne and Lee Qi, that one most important thing that we should know: we have found each other. We have found fast friends who became very close in a matter of two months.

My heart and chest was already heaving in total anguish about what was to come later. The moment was getting closer. I wondered how I would continue without XX.

I was trying my best (succeeded too) to put on a happy out look, cheery and all that bull. The girls, me, Choon Cheng, Audrey, Lee Qi, Cheronne, Hui Shan and Stephanie, talked, laughed and sang Disney and national songs at AMK MRT station, whilst waiting for the guys, HH, Biondi and Wai Yong to collect all the logistics left behind in Deyi Sec. I felt so attached to them. Even with Audrey and Choon Cheng, whom I just got to know only last week.

We took the train back to Bishan. I was crying and screaming and denying inside that we were about to be separated later. I denied and denied myself. I laughed and laughed at all the jokes. I looked and took everything in; aku melihatnya sepuas-puas hati.

Connect Singapore rocks!